Table Etiquette

In our family we follow some basic rules while at the table.

However, we'd probably still be considered complete heathens by some.

Let's look at one of our more formal meals - The Sunday Roast Beef Dinner complete with silverware, fine china, and guests.

1. Complete places are set for every meal. Everyone gets a knife, spoon and fork whether there is a need to use every utensil or not.
2. We wait until everyone is seated at the table before we make a move. The food is not touched at this point.
3. Grace is said.
4. We start helping ourselves to the food placed before us, then pass to the left. That's right, the left, not the right. Got it?
5. If a dish lands in front of you that you are not interested in, you continue to pass it to the left. You do not leave said dish stranded in front of you.
6. You only stop passing once you ensure that everyone at the table has partaken of the particular dish you are holding.
7. You can start eating at any time, but continue to pass dishes as requested (and salt and pepper are always passed together, not separately. Right Grandma?)
8. Nothing is cleared from the table until everyone has finished eating...unless Grandma is on her own agenda. :)
9. Dessert is served, guests first. We do not start our desserts until the server, usually Grandma, has returned to their seat and started their own dessert.
10. All dishes are washed, whether they were used or not.

From here on out there aren't any fast rules that we follow for this type of meal.

Now then, there's the regular, every day family meal. Let's say supper on a Tuesday night. Let's see if things change.

1. How the table is set depends on who sets it. Grandpa and I usually lay a full setting. Sherri will skip spoons, for example, if she knows neither she nor Glenn will use one at this meal. Sometimes serviettes are forgotten (that's napkins for any American readers), at least until Grandma gets home and puts them out.
2. We wait until everyone is seated before lifting any food, but we do make exceptions from time to time.
3. Grace is said.
4. We help ourselves to the nearest dish then pass to the left, unless say, Sherri or I are having trouble with one of the boys, in which case the others may take their food first and we'll get ours when we're ready. (this can happen during a Sunday Roast Beef Dinner as well).
5. Pass food even if you aren't interested in it. Sometimes a dish gets stranded, but some hungry person will eventually ask for it.
6. Stop passing once you ensure everyone's had a helping, or when you're overcome with hunger and HAVE to dig in immediately.
7. You can start eating at any time, but continue to pass dishes as requested (S&P together, same diff).
8. The table starts getting cleared when somebody feels like doing it.
9. If there is dessert to be had (usually left over from Sunday Roast Beef Dinner), we usually wait until everyone is served before eating it. Sometimes Grandpa will bring dessert out to the table and start eating it even before everyone has finished their supper! Say it isn't so!
10. All dishes are washed, whether they were used or not (unless they can be snuck back away into their respective cupboard or drawer without Grandma seeing).

• Burping and farting happens. Sorry to have to tell you that.
• I personally like to cut into anything I can with my fork. Why? I'm too lazy to use a knife unless I have to. I believe there are those who would find that incredibly disgusting.
• There is often lots of hollering and crying by the youngest members of the family.
• There is lots of getting up from the table and returning throughout a meal.
• Phones are often answered during meals, but not always.
• There is often too much barking by my dog, who gets yelled at until somebody sprays him with some water, or lets him out.
• We all try to help clean up whenever we can and as much as we can.
• Us kids are very thankful that Grandpa makes most of our suppers for us, and Grandma does the bulk of the cleaning up. Are we fortunate or what?

Unlike many families in this day and age, we are often able to spend 3 meals a day together around the table, and we wouldn't have it any different. Incredible. I think most of these "rules" came from my paternal grandmother, and to me, they're all about being considerate. It is so important to be considerate of others when you live with 6 other people, and when there are so many people in the world that we need to interact with each and every day.

I'd love to hear about your family meals. Do you have any rules while at the table?